My political evolution has been as awkward and varied as anyone's. I have dabbled in a variety of political schools of thought ranging from the weird to, I hope, the well-reasoned. I decided to track my political evolution from the beginning to illustrate for you, and analyze for myself, how I landed where I stand today.
FIRST POLITICAL MEMORIES
My very first memory involving politics was a classroom election between Ronald Reagan and Walter Mondale. I distinctly remember being one of the very, very few who voted for Mondale. Why? I wish I could say it was because I agreed with his stance on the issues of the mid-80s, but in reality I was absolutely voting "against the grain." l just remember that everyone was for Reagan, so I rebelled. It may be the only truly rebellious act of my youth. I was 8 years old, so I have no idea why I voted for milk over juice let alone presidential candidates.
I have vivid memory of the 1988 election and even remember the famous Willy Horton advertisement that made Dukakis seem like a friend to felons. I really never knew anything about the politics or issues of the day, but the ugly side came into full view. I remember Bush saying that you could tell when you got to Boston because you could smell Boston Harbor. I remember Dukakis being mocked for posing with a tank and looking rather silly in a combat helmet. I remember those topics dominating debate so much that I didn't feel alone in not understanding the issues.
Perhaps most influential to my early thinking was that much of my dad’s family thanks Franklin Delano Roosevelt for saving them in the wake of the Great Depression. My great-grandfather Eddie Renz was put to work by the New Deal and my family's oral history included heart-felt words of gratitude for FDR. Whenever anyone tells me WWII and not the New Deal broke the Great Depression, I can't help but call up the memory I have of my great-grandmother Mollie telling me that FDR and the New Deal programs saved them first.
DA MAN!
The lesson that would remain a constant: People matter above all else.
FINDING MY WAY
It wasn't until the 1992 election that I finally began to follow politics with some sort of ideology.
I remember talking about the upcoming election with my father during the first Iraq War. We both agreed that some poor Democrat would get slaughtered as Bush's approval ratings soared toward the 90s. By this time I was starting to understand the inherent differences between Democrats and Republicans.
Smart Bush
When I think back to my early political thoughts, the differences seemed so simple. To a high school student, everything is simple.
I quickly realized that Republicans tended toward a belief in the inherent ability of everyone to pull him or herself up by the bootstraps. Republicans seemed to be the more militant bunch. They obviously placed ultimate faith in the private, profit-driven sector and seemed intent on influencing, and often punishing, the moral decisions of the nation. I started to accept what were the common perceptions of the time; for example that Republicans were somehow better at foreign policy by just being Republicans.
I learned that Democrats believed in community and that many mistook that for socialistic tendencies. I learned that there was a perception that, as idealists, Democrats tended to be weaker on foreign policy issues. I also felt like the Democrats would stand up for the little guy. And, above all else, that gave them a leg up in my book. Again, to a high school student, these matters are fairly - indeed overly - simplified.
As a high school student: Democrat = Robin Hood... Republican = Ebenezer Scrooge... Such things are never as simple as when summed up in a young mind.
At any rate, I remember discovering these differences and began to ease my way toward a political identity. Little did I know at the time that the road would be long, winding and varied.
WHAT DOES DAD THINK?
For the record, my father never admitted to a political affiliation. I do not doubt he was registered with one of the parties (I suspect I know which one, but cannot say for certain). I remember that he was hesitant about telling me who he voted for in 1988 (I was 12 at the time). For whatever reason, I remember saying to him, "you didn't vote for Bush, did you?" I remember him grumbling about not wanting to discuss it. I cannot say who he voted for, but I just kind of deduced for myself that he voted for Bush. Considering that I was 12 at the time, take that deduction for what it's worth.
To his credit, my father NEVER told me who he was going to vote for. I also "deduced" that he voted for Perot in 1992. I remember him being somewhat passionate about Perot and even driving to work with his lights on (a Perot symbol of support on election day). Still, he never told me, and by then I knew not to ask.
Although I always knew my father as someone on the side of the little guy who cared for people, his apparent voting habits confused me. I know he never displayed much love for Reagan, but his preferences were not tied to party.
THE TURNING POINT
When the 1992 election came around, I latched onto Bill Clinton. I remember feeling like it was important to have the next generation come in, and Clinton was the first candidate I can remember who was "hip." He was on MTV answering a question about boxers and briefs, played the saxophone and debated like a lion. Bush played the part of the establishment candidate perfectly while Clinton displayed the kind of sharp wit you cannot teach. It was the critical analysis and high-voltage brain power of Clinton vs. the "because I said so" mentality of George Bush as the old guard WWII generation.
Sax Machine!
I never disliked George Bush, Sr. Had I possessed a more in-depth understanding of politics at the time (I was now 16), I would have found more to disagree with him about. Still, I happily consented to live under Bush Sr. In the aftermath of the Iraq War, I decided to trust his judgment as sound because he waged a war with the support of allies, succeeded, and managed not turn it into another quagmire. I remember how happy everyone was that we finally had a "positive" and popular war outcome and escaped the shadow of Vietnam. I’m not sure war is ever truly positive, but I did not feel it was waged recklessly, and that counts for something. I felt like George Bush presented a dignified face to the world on behalf of our country and I thought he surrounded himself with good and smart people (See Baker, James III).
Still, by 1992, there was a feeling like, because the war was over and domestic policies needed tending, it was time to change things up. I consider the '92 election as less a repudiation of Bush than an embracing of Clinton. I know Perot took Republican votes, but, as we would discover later (See Nader, Ralph), that happens sometimes.
Despite my fondness for Clinton in '92, I remember losing track of politics for most of the Clinton presidency. Ironically, it was during the Clinton years in office that I dabbled in Republican ideas.
Show me the Knuckle!
A RIGHT TURN
I gladly voted for Clinton again in '96 because I felt he earned re-election, and it seemed like the Republicans had conceded that by nominating 856-year-old Bob Dole to challenge him. However, during Clinton’s term, I started to explore the right-of-center territory of politics.
I was pretty uptight for a college student, and began to project my own discipline onto those around me. I remember trying (very ineffectively) to make the argument that we ought to let smokers smoke to their heart's content so that they can make way for the "enlightened" among us. Nothing encourages terrible arguments quite like youth. Obviously, no one will try to take cigarettes away, but my attempt at a Darwinism argument was less than honorable, even for a teenager. How quickly I forgot that we are supposed to care for our fellow man, no matter the cause of his plight.
I did not drink, I did not smoke, I never did drugs (still haven't, amazingly enough), and I expected the same from everyone else. I also began to feel like anyone could just go to school like I did and make a better life for him or herself. If I could do it, anyone could, right? I conveniently ignored the help I got, the support I enjoyed, the discipline I was taught, and all the other advantages I had. That led to “give people the opportunity to learn to fish and let them starve or not” state of mind. Ironically, even though I don’t care as much about the “hot button” social issues, I was somewhat “socially conservative” if only against vice.
In other ways, I remain a bit conservative. I have always believed that fiscal responsibility is important. Back then, I started to see the over-spending of the Democrats as antithetical to that. (for those not familiar with what is now apparently ancient history... Republicans used to stand for fiscal responsibility).
I remember even deciding that I would change my registration to Republican. I had walked to the edge of the plank and I stared over the edge. I remember even consciously deciding to give the conservative side one last final look before making that plunge. I purposely sought out conservative ideological reading material and listened to conservative commentary. It was hit-and-miss.
That all changed when Bill Clinton was impeached. I immediately realized how horrible it is to care too much about failures that stem from our human nature. I can remember reading scandalous accounts of cigars and pillow talk in the Denver Post and feeling almost sick to my stomach that we cared so much about those details. Ken Starr ultimately convinced me that the right side of the spectrum was not for me. No one benefits from $70-million investigations about oral sex. Obviously, Clinton made a huge mistake, and I cannot condone it. But the reaction was so vitriolic, unforgiving, political and just ugly that it made me sick.
After a Republican courtship, I decided to register as an Independent. If for no other reason, I just didn't feel comfortable siding with the ones who felt so strongly about a person’s personal life as to take the extraordinary actions taken against Clinton. It was a sign of things to come. Gay marriage, abortion, illegal immigration… From one issue to the next, it just seemed like the right revealed itself as a party that picks at social knits and appealed to the inner fear and loathing some humans feel toward others. That ended my brief Republican experiment.
ROZEK AS GUIDANCE
Professor Edward Rozek, a political science professor with deep conservative roots, remains the best professor I ever had. He led an unbelievable life. He was born in Krakow, Poland and lived there when the Nazis invaded. He then fought as a soldier in the war and eventually made his way to America.
He worked hard and made his way to Harvard. He taught political science for something like 40 years. He challenged his students in unique ways and pulled the very best effort from me. His opinions were harsh regarding communism and its evils. He had worked in the Reagan administration in a capacity I cannot now remember.
But, although his opinions tended to be further right than I had ever ventured, he would always end a lecture by encouraging us to listen to all sides. He taught critical thinking, and even stressed that our own unique designs may also prove equally correct.
Although I respected his intellect, his arguments and everything about him as a teacher, I realized that my beliefs were simply more center than right. And, in many ways, left of center. Still, his insistence on the little things, like not wearing hats in class and not reading the newspaper in class (unheard of rules for a university), also earned my respect.
He remains the best professor I have ever had, and his lessons about how to think have always remained with me. Ironically, he taught me that I was ill-suited for life as a Republican.
OVER-COMPENSATION
Quite frankly, I overcompensated toward the left in law school. I think that had more to do with the worst president this nation has ever seen. To be clear, I was never as far left as some of my classmates, but George W. Bush pushed so far to the right that many of us outside of the very far right had to run in the opposite direction just to balance life.
I was disappointed that W. had won in 2000 because he seemed entirely too cock-sure and did not have the authoritative feel of his father. He had all the aggressive ideas of the old guard without the authoritative experience, credibility and judgment to back it up (see Service, Military – if one is going to take strong military positions, this becomes more important). Still, I did not know just how bad things would be at the time, so I was not overly concerned that Gore had lost in 2000. In truth, I preferred John McCain at that time over all others running. The shell of that man is running again today.
Little did I know that our country’s most controversial election (hanging chads, Supreme Court case, Ralph Nader, etc.) would lead to 8 horrible years for me politically.
I was in law school while the craziest arguments I've ever heard were being made. Arguments I felt were not even privately appropriate were suddenly being made loudly and with the authority of the Presidential Seal.
Division Accomplished
I felt the argument to invade Iraq was insane from the word go... I was deeply offended by the Patriot Act... torture… leaking of CIA identity for political gain… saber rattling… false diplomacy… lack of transparency… I could go on for days. Needless to say, the 2004 election result was the hardest for me to swallow. That one physically hurt. I didn’t get over that election for weeks or months (I’m not completely sure I’m over it today).
I’ve ranted about those issues on these pages already, so I won’t detail them further here. Suffice it to say, I have not been in a political "happy place" for the past 8 years.
Got Fear?
WHERE I STAND
All that said, my stance today is different than before. I’m pretty well moderate with a slight lean to the left as a tip of the hat to my core belief that people matter. Whether you agree or disagree that the left represents people more, that is absolutely my perspective on it.
Still, I’ve become more and more of a political pragmatist. I support Obama’s health care package more because it is designed to pass in today’s political world than because I think it solves all problems. I believe it will address all of the problems, but it has a much better chance of passing into law than any mandated universal package.
Gradualism has its bad points, but, sometimes even a small step forward beats going backward. We've gone backwards for too long. The reality is that too many Republicans are against mandated universal health care to make it possible to become law. That reality necessitates a response. Once the votes are in place, then politicians are free to do what will ultimately further the cause. Until then, reality matters.
The health care debate is just one example, but I see myself considering the reality on the ground more and more.
I am comfortable in my political skin right now. Perhaps I’m more comfortable than ever before. In part, I feel that way because I think about these issues all the time. However, I fully expect my outlook to change as I grow older. The day I stop analysis or stop re-thinking politics will be a sad day and I hope to never experience such a halt.
Ultimately, we all must find our own way. We can only use our own senses to find that way, and it’s important to ask how we got where we are and why we believe what we believe.
I will try to flush out my beliefs on specific topics more in coming posts. The hope is that, by writing them, I will further analyze my reasons and perhaps refine my thinking. Or become emboldened to by own enlightenment… you know, whatever happens.
In the meantime: Vote Obama!
The Future
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